Wisconsin Voices For Recovery Newsletter

As a young boy, I (Dave Larson) remember my dad tilting a pan and using a card to get seeds out of some smelly tobacco he had. Around 4years old 1977. As any child would be I was curious and asked about it after I saw him hiding it from his dad ( my GPA). He told me it’s illegal so I am not to say Anything to Anyone cuz dad could get in trouble. I (Dave Larson) remember the guy he got it from would pull into our driveway in a big Cadillac or ltd or something.

He was so big he could barely get out and he’d go to his trunk and pull out a hand truck, load it with a bunch of different boxes and wheel it into our house. I (Dave Larson) knew they were doing drugs when they would go to the bathroom with their friends too but I never asked about that. 

My big cousin would come over on weekends to get high before she went out so after such a night my dad hands me a joint and says just suck like a straw. I choked a lot. And he told me to take another and another. I would just sit and stare at the wall with my mouth open for 3 hours or more. The next weekend I was stoned when she came over for her weekend treats. She freaked out and thought I was overdosing and wanted my mom to bring me to the E.R. so my mom made me tell her I was ok.

I remember my parent would go out almost every weekend and I and my bro would go to games right across the street. Sometimes they’d pick us up so. times wed stay. But I think every nite they fight. And it always seemed to be cuz my mom talked to a guy at the bar. And she’d get the shit beat out of her. Back then there wasn’t even a law against it so he never got in trouble.

He was a dick and by the time I (Dave Larson) was 9 and my bro 7 we had been punched in the face at least 2 times, kicked in the balls once, and got spit in our faces countless times. ( and that was the worst id rather take the beating cuz a grown-ass man spit in yer face is enough to puke!). 

At about 8 years dad would have a friend come to smoke weed after dinner every nite. Well I got cut in the first 2 or 3 days then he told me I didn’t need it every nite and I blew a fuse, straight freaked out but to no avail) by then the parents we r e divorced and I got drunk with mom several times and she tried to get me hammered. I (Dave Larson) puked every time.

She found another guy and he beat her as much as a dad..who I had to call to come to stop the guy from beating her cuz the cops barely would do anything…one time the guy locked my brother in the trunk of the car for whining. And my dad found out… My dad and his friend beat that guy till the guy ran to the police station and my dad and company were beating on him right into the front door… ‘s about the time we went to get my cousin one day and my dad pulls over and tells me to,” watch for the heat” while he chopped a line on his glove box lid for them both… my uncle built homes and was an alcoholic like the rest of the family so he bought a bar down the street from our house and it became quite popular. 

Dad Was Always Fighting In The Bar

My uncle’s kids were closer in age to my dad than my uncle was so they were all 18 -25 age group and id go in and order drinks for my mom and whoever and walk them back home. Id gets paid to help clean it in the morning with beef jerky and quarters to play video games. My dod built a gym downstairs and he and my cousin went to a few bodybuilding contests. Dad was always fighting in the bar and a lot of times the kids stay outside the bar for hours and hours waiting for our parents to quit drinking for the nite.

We had big old Tonka truck tracks built and stuff. Half the time the door would fly open and a couple of drunk brawlers would fly out, see us and hive us time to get out of the way then carry on with their brawl… mom finally met a guy that didn’t beat her and he moved us 300 miles away tellin her they were gonna get married. 2 days after we got there he left 250$ in the medicine cabinet and a dear john letter. Mom stayed there with us and was working 3 jobs to feed and shelter us, dad didn’t send shit except at Xmas he would send a large box stuffed with pre-wrapped presents for us.

I Missed Him So Much 

 I remember my brother busted her taking the tags off and sign in her name cuz she couldn’t afford anything for us and he didn’t get why she was doing that… I missed him so much though. we lived on a busy street and were playing ball one day and it got kicked into that street and I almost ran after it without thinking, well it got to the street and a Winnebago didn’t even have time to break and hit it and it flew half the block. I (Dave Larson) remember it happening in slow motion and that was my 1st brush with death.

When we needed shoes were shopping for other stuff at Kmart one day and she says to try on some then we found some and she slid our old shoes into these cibby type drawers to hide them and she says to just act cool. And we stole shoes to have something. To wear. Our neighbors were native American from the state we left.