Table Of Contents
Throughout middle school I (Nick Serrecchio) drank beer here and there; my buddy’s older brother would buy it for us when I stayed over. Then I smoked weed for the first time in 8th grade with a different friend’s brother. I remember going home completely fried trying to hide it from my Mom and Dad, who just so happened to be in the front room, and soon as I walked through the door in which I made a B line for the bathroom and got a shower quick! After so long I started smoking weed on a regular, like every day!
A Few Years Later My World Came Crumbling Down
By this point, I had already started writing poetry and freestyle rap lyrics using it as an outlet after hearing some Tupac, Mase, Biggy, Puff, and LL Cook J. I (Nick Serrecchio) never planned on becoming a famous rapper or poet, I just needed to get the burdens I carried out of my head without actually having to talk about them with someone. My Dad was a great man and father especially for being my dad when no one else wanted to, but he wasn’t the easiest to talk to. He was ridiculously hard on me and had a horrible temper; scared the shit out of me.
He was teaching me the work ethic and how to be responsible and to take care of what I did have. But he taught by publicly humiliating or screaming and calling me useless. But he was a great dad nevertheless. Other than slapping the holy hell outta me on several different occasions. Seems like the older I got, the more threatened by me he was. Even though, every time he slapped me, I never once hit him back out of respect and because he was my dad!
I’m more proud of quitting smoking than of anything else I’ve done in my life, including winning an Oscar. – Christine Lahti
I was casually smoking weed and drinking at this point in life, I had to be at least 16 or 17 years old. A few years later my world came crumbling down leaving me vulnerable and reckless, and my addiction took new avenues and took those avenues all the way!
My Best Committed Suicide
I had a best friend who was more like a brother to me, and we caused a lot of havoc, partners in crime, we fought together and were there for each other when we couldn’t take the weight from what lived rent-free in our heads. We hung out and got into some fight with these older guys and then he went home and so did I. I (Nick Serrecchio) was about twenty years old doing community service the following morning when I got a call from his mother telling me that he committed suicide and she needed my help so I took off to her house in complete disbelief because I was just with him.
I was walking up the driveway and saw his mom in the garage and the door was open like 4ft but enough that I could see his feet swinging and I ran in there and lifted him up so she could get him free and it was like nothing I’ve ever seen. His neck was elongated more than naturally possible and I couldn’t believe that my best friend was really gone and I didn’t see any signs the night before! Were they there or was I not paying attention!? I remember telling my Dad and he was actually very supportive and empathetic which was surprising. That’s when I started taking pills like valium, Xanax, Klonopin, Vicodin, and drinking heavier.
My Boss Comes Out And Tells Me I Need To Go Home Because They Found My Dad
Ten months later life goes from bad to worse, not to mention I had already been to jail a few times for various petty crimes. My Dad kicked me out of the house, which wasn’t out of the ordinary, but his reason was! Two weeks later my Mom leaves him because he’s doing and saying some off-the-wall shit that was not true. He comes home from work sees that she’s gone and makes something up and gets her arrested.
I bond her out and we both stay at my Aunt’s for the time being but it’s father’s day and I call him because despite his rambunctious behavior he still deserved to get a happy father’s day from me and after I told him and he realized it was me on the phone he did something I (Nick Serrecchio) never seen or heard him do in my entire life… he cried! He was hurting that bad that he couldn’t hide it. The next day I get up and go to work and that’s about the time my boss comes out and tells me I need to go home because they found my dad…..
I Dreamed Of My Dad Every Night
Days prior, I was just saying how I hated him and it wouldn’t even bother me if he were to die, but I was also mad at him… Pulled up to the house same time as my mom and that’s when we found out my dad took his life on father’s day then they dropped the charges against my mom because his suicide note admitted that he lied about the whole thing.
That was the hardest day of my entire life! I was eating Xanax daily to try to forget the enormous amount of pain that consumed me. Unfortunately, it also made it much easier to make really bad decisions! I lost my best friend and dad to suicide in 6 months’ time.
“It’s only when you grow up, and step back from him, or leave him for your own career and your own home – it’s only then that you can measure his greatness and fully appreciate it. Pride reinforces love.” – Margaret Truman
I dreamed of my dad every night; that he wasn’t really gone and he was walking through the door and I believed he was alive until I woke up only to come to the real and 2 months later and to make matters worse.
Nick Serrecchio Ended Up Using Meth To Get Help Through The Withdrawals
I was incarcerated on my way to start my first prison sentence of 36 months, Burglary of an occupied structure (F2). Ended up in one of the most violent Ohio prisons in that time, never allowing myself to grieve out of fear of showing vulnerability. I moved to Florida soon after my release and did great for 3 or so years only drinking.
Drinking heavily! Went through a breakup that sent me back over the edge started doing painkillers (addicted to painkillers) and tried crystal meth for the first time! I would go without painkillers for a few days and start feeling real achy with cold sweats just assumed I was getting the cold or something until my buddy brought it to my attention that I was probably pilling sick which snuck up on me.
By this time I was in love with methadone and meth and I (Nick Serrecchio) was selling it and going to work selling it to co-workers at a job that I jogged up the ladder and was looked at as their best builder, never missed work or anything. I ended up losing my job due to my attendance from being pill sick or whatever bullshit reason I came up with.
Figured I made more money selling dope anyways. I ended up using meth to help get through the withdrawals from the methadone after 6 weeks and I was still withdrawing heavily so I traded one addiction for the next.
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